2007: January - February

28
Feb
Riley Ann; the first great grandbaby for my mom.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


My sister, Dashababy is a grandma.  For those of you that know my sister, know that she is way to hawt to ever be called, ‘Grandma’, but she seems to be

pretty damn proud of that title, so go over to her place and check out her first grandbaby. (Leave her comments too, she gets so jealous sometimes!)

The more pictures I see of her, the more she looks like my sister.  How did Kathy’s genes get to be so strong that even MY kid looks like her though?
Congrats Paul and Tanya. Welcome to this crazy family, Riley Ann!

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26
Feb
Going Back In Time This Week
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
It feels like the days are dragging into each other huh?
The need to get on a plane is overwhelming.
My sister called the other night begging me to move back to Redding.  She used the guilt trip method too. She must not be reading my blog lately because,

“Co-Dependant No More” doesn’t allow guilt trips.  I backed up that book with a Dr. Phil book.
Tonight I was actually thinking about it though.  It might have been the Journey song that came on the radio.  You see, in Redding they live by classic rock.

They play Journey and Air Supply in church up there.  It’s scary how out of the music industry they are.    Anyway, a Journey song came on and the heater

was blowing full blast…and the memories of Redding and Shingletown came flooding back.  Good ones.

Redding is about 30 degrees hotter than hell on a good day.  During the summer you have to have a towel in car to put over the steering wheel because if you

touch the steering wheel after leaving the car in the sun for more than 2 minutes your hands WILL MELT.  If you forget the towel, you have to learn how to

drive with the tips of two fingers.  God forbid you have a stick shift.

Living in Shingletown while going to high school in Redding without car means you’re spending an hour and half on the school bus, in the heat, going uphill

on the curviest road created.  You learn real fast to make friends with people who have cars.  You can get home twice as fast and you don’t have to peel your

legs off the pleather seats every few minutes.  Our school bus in the 80′s looked like we were transporting  30 long haired dogs with all of us fighting to stick

our heads out the windows.  It was either to get some relief from the heat or to avoid the barf smell that lingers when someone throws up on the bus because

of the nauseating drive.

The driving arrangements went like this; Preps and Jocks drove the slammed mini-trucks.  These would seat two and the driver.
The guys who hung out with the preps drove El Caminos.  These only sat two and the driver.
The guys who were just the dude that ‘hung out’ drove Honda Civics.  seating FOUR and he driver.
Now you have the girls;  Only one girl in our group drove and she lived half way between Redding and Shingletown and couldn’t drive us all the way home.

She did drive a bad-ass Camaro.  Kudos to chicks with big hair and nice cars.

The pecking order for being a passenger in a glorious car instead of the bus went like this;  Girlfriend first. Best Friend second, Best friend’s girlfriend is

third.

I dated the guy who rode a skateboard.
My best friend’s boyfriend lived in Redding…and probably had a suspended licenses.
Guess who rode the bus a lot?

One year I managed to secure a spot with the guy who drove the beat up Honda Civic.  It didn’t have air conditioning, but that was okay.  What sucked is that it

overheated all the time so we would have to drive with the heater on to cool the engine.  It didn’t have FM stereo either.  All five of us would take turns

thinking of a song we all knew the words to.  Being from Redding the only songs we could sing with accuracy was Journey.

So with the heater blazing, feet burning, smoking and singing we were creating one of the greatest memories I had of living in Shingletown/Redding.

Tomorrow I will have to tell you about my best friends. There is picture that is now circling the internet with me in holding an empty bottle of Tequila.  This

picture is RIGGED. RIGGED I SAY!  I can honestly say I have NEVER done a single shot of that evil toxin.
Never have I heard a story start with, “OMG, this one night I had such a good night, I was drinking Tequila.”
Nope, It usually start with, “The worst night of my life I was drinking Tequila…” and it ends up up with the story teller weaving you into a tale of puking and

losing garments of clothing.”

I’m sure you have a story like that one.   Tell it, as long as it doesn’t involve a Journey song. That would be just too pathetic.

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25
Feb
the MD websites say it’s because of stress. Whatever. God just hates me.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Yesterday my left eyelid started twitching. It wasn’t the cute, ‘Whoa, my eyelid just twitch for a second!” it was the, “DEAR LORD STOP” variety of eye

twitching.

My eye has been twitching non-stop.  When it stops twitching for a few minutes it aches from all the twitching it was doing and I feel like I have the evil eye

arch.  Just when I think it’s gone…TWITCH.

There is something strange that happens when you have a twitch.  You have to show everyone to confirm the twitch exists.  I keep throwing my face into

Shaun’s; “SEE IT? DO YOU SEE IT TWITCHING?”  he starts giggling at me, which makes me frown and that sends the twitching deeper into my brain.
Tyler came into the bedroom to lay on the bed to watch TV and my eye started a full fledged twitching party.
“TYLER! LOOK! CAN YOU SEE MY TWITCH? OH MY GOD! see it? You do huh? You see the twitch-twitchity twitch thing right? see it?”  Of course, he giggled

at me. No sympathy for the eye twitching.

It’s been 24 solid hours of twitching (I checked the videotapes, I was twitching while I slept too) and my eyelid hurts like hell.

Shaun said it looks like my eyebrow has bass.

Any closet eyelid twitchers out there?  How do you get it to go away!?

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24
Feb
Thank you…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
She will read all your messages and I told her, “The internet loves you, Kara.” She smiled and thanked me for the 3 page letter I wrote her telling her about

the proudest moment I have ever experienced.  I’ll share it with you;

Going back to college was a very hard thing for me to do.  I had spent many years just trying to find the time to get into a GED prep class.  It was impossible

to do because I had a young, little girl that needed me there and I used the excuse that no matter how many times I tried to get to class, my ex would be late. I

feared he was sabotaging my efforts to make something more of myself in fear that I would come to my senses and leave him.  This may or may not have

been the case, but the reality of it was that I was the one that was allowing myself to be sabotaged. I can not blame my failure on someone else.

After finding the most fantastic teacher that pushed me to do things I never thought I could do, I took my GED and I passed with flying colors.  (Okay, I

skinned by on the math part, but made up for it in History)  I then decided to join college and see what I could do.  I signed up for the hardest class they

offered. Computer Science and Electronics.  I was given a tour around campus and in each of the classes there was not a woman to be found.  The adviser

told me that the IT department was built mostly around men. She suggested I take the business course.  I told her that I wanted the IT classes and signed up.
I cried the whole time I was filling out the paper work because I was so terrified of already failing.  I had to do it. It was a sign from God.  I mean this in the

most strangest of ways too.  On my way to a job I very good at, but not leading anywhere I took the wrong turn. I was in the middle of my crosstown prayer to

God that went something like this, “Dear God, please let today be better than it was yesterday. Please let him see what effort I am putting into this job. Please

don’t let his wife come in today and beat me down and make me feel stupid.  Please, if this is not where you want me, direct me to the place you want me.”

and that’s when I realized I missed my turn and I had to pull into a driveway that led to the College.  I pulled up and it had some lame sign about, ‘Finding

your future’.  I then tried to pull out of the place and kept looping back to the front of the school.  Trapped in the parking lot.   This was my sign. Either come

back and check it out or get a GPS system.

After my first few classes I was convinced I was a complete moron and there was no way I was going to be able to pull it off.  When my electronic classes

kicked in, I realized that my father must have given me SOMETHING through his DNA because I understood this, like I had studied it in a past life. I aced every

single test I took.  My parents were going to be so proud.

It was the hardest 2 years of my life, but because of my beautiful friend, Lisa taking care of my kids and my wonderful friend Keith helping me financially I

made it through.  ‘Cita pulled me off the couch a few times when I thought for sure I was going to quit.  I did it though.  I couldn’t wait for my mom and dad

see me cross that stage to pick up my diploma.

My dad didn’t show up.  My mother was there and she was beaming from ear to ear.  After I crossed the stage and past her, I stopped and handed her my

tassle.  This woman deserved it just as much as I did. She watched me struggle through first grade until the day I finally quit high school.  She tried…ohhhh,

mamma tried.

I thought for sure that would be the proudest moment of my life, but it wasn’t.  The moment came when I looked at Kara and saw how proud of me she was.
For all the years I watched her with proud parent eyes as she took her first steps, put on her shoes for the first time, walked into her first classroom and all the

other scary things in life…she was looking at me with the same look of admiration.

Sometimes I feel like she’s walking in my shoes.  Living my life all over. It’s painful to see those things, because I was so scared to death for so many years.

Who am I kidding? I am still scared.
I just want to her to have a fair shot of not feeling like she has to take the first thing that is thrown at her. I want her to know that there is someone out there,

there are lots of someones out there that will think she is hot shit on a stick.  It feels SO damn good to be loved like you know you deserve to be loved.

She wants someone to hold her hand. She wants someone to say, “Kara is my girlfriend.” and I get that. I totally get that.

You’re all so very special for the things you wrote. I know she will read all of them and know she is loved.  She is beautiful. It’s so hard to believe sometimes.

My wonderful friend from High School sent me some pictures of us.  I use to think I was so ugly and now I look at those pictures and giggle at what a damn

cutie I was.  I had the hair, the acid washed jeans (his pegged) and a dorky boyfriend…how could life get any better than that?  I hope she can look back at her

pictures and say, “Yeah, I was hot!”


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22
Feb
TO DO LIST: Make sure Kara understands she is worthy of LOVE
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


By the grace of God I will not let her believe she isn’t worthy of the love she deserves.
She doesn’t need to believe the shit those boys in 8th grade say to her.
YES, she is different. NO, she isn’t a cheerleader or a popular. YES, she has a weird sense of humor. NO, she isn’t the smartest girl in school.
BUT SCREW YOU, she is BETTER than all those girls will EVER be.

OH, the places she will go.  She will will travel and see the world. She will graduate from college and prove you wrong.  She will be beautiful and when she

smiles…all of her teeth will be in the exact place they should be.  Her personality will make you wish you had given her the time of day.  She won’t remember

you though. You know who she will remember? She will remember Kyle Hudgins and how you all picked on him and how he ALWAYS had her back.  She will

remember his friendship and respect him for it.  YOU will not get that respect because you wouldn’t sit next to her in the gym because she was ‘different’.  For

the girls who pick and tease her, you will also not be remembered.  She will remember Avery and how Avery was always there to understand her silly jokes

and call her when she was down.
She will meet someone who will love her for ALL that she is.  Weird, dorky, funny, beautiful and SMART.

But, dear God…give me the strength to teach her these things, that she IS worthy of all of this. Don’t let her settle for the first person that shows her attention.

Let me be smart enough to teach her that she is SMART and she is BEAUTIFUL and SO SO SO WORTHY.  She doesn’t deserve to ever feel trapped, unloved,

scared and pushed into a corner.

Kinda deep for a To Do List huh?

Did you play?

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22
Feb
It’s Thursday….Tomorrow is Friday.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Okay, this year seriously BITES on American Idol. I really don’t like any of the guys. the women are split down the middle.

I like the Jack Osborne guy because…well, he’s weird and funny.  He can sing, but he’s no Chris Daughtry.

The women;  How do you politically correctly say this?  Screw it.  The black girls ROCK, KICK ASS, CAN SING!.  I mean, ALL of them are fifty times better than

the white girls.  There, bring on the hate mail, I said ‘black and white’ and compared the two.

Now on to the Shaun Commentary from the evening (the only real reason I watch this show).

After returning from picking Marina up from church and missing the second and third singers.

“What did I miss?”
“Nothing. You have to rewind and watch the dog walker, she’s sort of weird.”
“The red head? I HATE HER!”
“Shaun, you haven’t even her sing yet.”
“Doesn’t matter. I HATE HER.”
“Why?”
“You can’t ask that, You can’t ask WHY I hate someone. I just do.”
“Oooohhh-kay.”

After she started singing;

“Well, I don’t really like her either, but I do like her boots!”
“You know what those boots are?” he asks.
“No?” .
“Those boots were made for dog walkin’.  And that’s just what they’ll do.”

He REALLY doesn’t like the dog walking, red head.

Tomorrow’s SPF: ‘Your TO DO list’.

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21
Feb
I can’t find mine.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
When Shaun and I were going through our baby withdrawals we decided we needed to do something to get past it.   We headed to Walmart and bought MP3

players.  They had all types of colors, but we wanted the ones that were on sale and because of it, we both ended up with two identical white MP3 players.  We

were going to take our cute, matching MP3 players to the gym.

I THOUGHT mine was the one in the van until I started listening to the music on there.
“Hmm, sure a lot of Matchbox 20 on here.”   Don’t get me wrong. I love me some Rob Thomas, but I really don’t remember adding every single song he has

recorded on to my MP3 player.
“AH HA!”  (the exclamation, not the band) “AH-HA! this isn’t mine. This one has to be Shaun’s player.  I mean, come on…I would never in a million years put

The Momma’s and the Papa’s on mine.”

Today I found MY MP3 player in the van. I turned it on and it was, none other than, Matchbox 20.
“Crap, this is Shaun’s! AGAIN.”
In an effort to make sure it wasn’t really mine I had to shuffle through the songs until I found the music that is exclusively MY taste in music and not Shauns:

Chris Cornell covering Michael Jackson’s Billie Jean.
I Will Survive By Gloria Gaynor (doesn’t every work out involve THIS song?)
Every song from Kid Rock’s Rebel Without A Cause CD.
Violent Femmes’ Kiss Off
Limp Bizkit’s Break Things

and last, but of course not least;

Conjunction Function by School House Rock

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20
Feb
Ra-Ra-Rannnndom
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


It’s my grab bag of catch up.

I thought it was Monday and my day was screwed up all day because of it.

People, especially clients who you went over the moon to please and then they turned you around and put it in your rear, REALLY piss me off and make me

sad at the same time.

American Idol this year; to quote people who are way more hip than I am, ‘I am not feelin’ it‘. I like the Jack Osborne looking dude. That is all.

I pulled out some books I needed to re-read. This book, I recommend for everyone that breathes: Co-Dependant No More by Melody Beattie
the tagline for the book is, “How to stop controlling others and start caring for yourself” It was written 20 years ago for people living with people in AA or

battling alcoholism.
Now don’t let that turn you away because you’re not a ‘controlling’ person or living with/dealing with alcoholism. This book has saved my life once before and

since rereading it again, I am amazed how much of the lessons I learned and stuck with me.
“I did not cause it. I can not control it. I can not cure it.” This was the line that jumped out at me the first time I read it and I think because of reading this

book, dealing with the things in my life is allowing me to be able to look at situations and say, “That’s not mine, that’s yours.”

Britney – Media, leave the girl alone. She is just doing what we all have wanted to do; lose our damn minds and do something nuts. I would do the same thing

right now, but the bald spots…not so attractive…red and patchy. Eww.

Anna Nicole – Media, show more boobs.

RAP CAT CONTROVERSY: This commercial started a revolution and now animal activists are pissed that Checkers (the hamburger joint) have a take out bag

that you can cut the holes out of and dress your cat up in ‘rap cat’ costume.
People that are pissed: KNOCK IT OFF! Have you missed EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO HAS A DOG AND TOO MUCH MONEY? It’s a bag and a cat. These

people would be SO pissed at me if they found out the stuff we did to our cat. It involves tape on the bottom of the paws and a bong hit.

SPF: Your TO DO list. I’m not a list maker, but I like to see the writing of our readers and sometimes I get to catch a view of a ‘doodle’ on your list.

Mental Health: I am SO Britney Spears right now. I’m not the cute dancing in the hallway in a sexy uniform Britney. I’m not the sucking face with Madonna

Britney. I am not the driving around with the kid on my lap Britney. I’m also not the strange lipstick and no shoes interview Britney.
I am really close to the shaving of the head crazy Britney. They have a 24 hour ‘anxiety rehab’ I can check into?

No worries, I promise to keep my panties on and not flash the media my coochie.

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20
Feb
IE vs. Firefox…Yes, this AGAIN.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random



Does Random and Odd look like this when you view it?

Yes? No?  What browser are you all using??

I really like this layout and want to be able to work with it, but I don’t want to use it if you guys see it like this:


Eww, Internet Explorer makes it all squishy to the side and all not centered and all not good at all.

This post brought to you by the word: ALL.

Okay, so How do you all see it? First picture? Second picture? IE or Firefox?

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20
Feb
Your Two Cents…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random

The windows of Coit tower have pennies and other denominations of money on the ledges from visitors from other countries. It’s cool.

It’s been a couple of months and I keep saying I wanted to redesign Random and Odd. Last night I decided it was going to be the night.
NINETY ONE pages of 9 screen shots each to wade through. 91. I must have FTPed about 70 different designs to my editor and checked to see how everything

lined up.
They have everything from truly ugly to damn ugly. There are spatterings of ‘oh hell no’ themes.

I realized half way through the search that I was looking for something that fits the person I am ‘right now’. I paused for awhile and thought about it.
“Shaun, I need you to make me a header that has band-aides all over it.”
“Why?”
“Because that’s what I feel like.”
“I’m not seeing your vision.”

I figured around midnight that I wanted something very plain. I couldn’t wake up Shaun and have him make me a ‘simple, but classy’ header so I had to make

it myself. The sleeping pill had kicked in and THAT up there is what you got.

It’s going to take some getting use to. I still have to link up some stuff and get rid of the missing people on my links list. I also need to get rid of the people

that are fair weather peoples…so if you’re over there, raise your hand. If you’re here all the time and you’re not on that list, raise your hand.

Oh and did the redesign fix the problem with people not being able to update their information?

TWO CENTS ANYONE?

UPDATED:  Thanks for the honesty on how it looks. I am guessing the people that are seeing that huge clump of white to the right are the people using

MICROSOFT IE and not FIREFOX (the superior browser).  When I opened it in IE, I could see what you were talking about. That was a look I wasn’t going for.

In fact, I went through a bunch that looked like that in Firefox and deleted them.  Darn it.

Yes, it’s stark huh? Like, almost hospital type of clean.
*sigh*  I found a layout I liked, but it was all Christmasy.  Since Shaun was asleep I couldn’t get him to change the design of it to get rid of the presents and

ornaments.

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19
Feb
Airing out the dirty laundry…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


One of the millions of reasons I love living so close to San Francisco is that we can throw a few kids in the van and drive down for the day on last minutes

notice.

The girls had a dance on Friday and Kara looked out of this world beautiful, Click Here and agree with me. Saturday we gathered all the girls and each of them

brought a friend with them for a ‘coast trip’.
These trips are normally fun because we just drive until we see the ocean and start squealing until Shaun can take it any longer and pulls over.
Half way there, I decided I wanted to see Coit Tower.  It has been about a million years since I had been there.  I remembered being able to see the whole city

and what an awesome place to it would be to bring the girls to.
I remember as a teenager being driven up there in a limo when I had gone to my friend Bron Sullivan’s prom.   This time…we didn’t drive.   Shaun, being the

evil son of bitch he is, thought we should take the stairs.

Looking up it didn’t seem to bad.  I mean, how many steps could it be? I could see the tower from the street.   You wanna know how many steps there are? A

FUCKINTRIBILLION.  You wanna know how many times I had to stop and convince myself that I was certainly not going to die? You wanna know how many

times I kicked myself in the ass for agreeing to this? You wanna know how many times I wanted to shove a Nikon D70  up Shaun’s ass?  A

FUCKINGTRITRILLION.

Was it worth it? I don’t know. I hurt today so bad that I can’t bend my knees when I walk. The muscles on the back of my legs feel like I shoved lemons under

the skin. KNOTS THAT BIG!

We then went to Haight and Ashbury.  When did this place become a little soho?  Where did all the stoned street performers go?  Where did the cool shops

with funky jewelery go?  Everything was overpriced and the smell of pot no longer lingered out the smoke shops.  It was lame and I was so sorry for my poor,

teenage children that they will never know the real Haight and Ashbury as it was before Apple and Starbucks bought it.

We ended the trip off to Pier 39.  Of course, we couldn’t escape the lure of the mini donuts. twice.   Kara insisted we watch the performer that does magic

tricks. She got pulled on to stage, as did Shaun. THOSE pictures have to be edited before I can upload them. Kara did a cute duck call trick, but in a separate

part of the show Shaun had to hold the pole for the tight rope walker.  I promised Shaun I wouldn’t put the ones up of her 54 year old crotch up on his head or

the one where she is feeling him up without his approval.  I mean, come on…isn’t that what you do in a marriage? You don’t embarrass your husband with

pictures like that.  Would you?  Okay, raise your hand if you would put pictures of an old lady using your husband as a latter to get on the tight rope?  Keep

raising your hand if that woman was wearing a dress?  Keeeeeep raising them if you had a picture of riding his head and pulling his hair?
Put your hand down.
Now raise your hand if you’re going to PayPal me some money to help pay for my divorce.  Come on, I just told the whole internet that my husband had old

person snatch on his head.

And then on to the part of the story that won’t get me smothered while I sleep;  Today I am paying the price for all the fun we had yesterday.  The only reason I

am still typing and not rolling around in pain is because the warmth of the laptop on my legs is keeping me from screaming.

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16
Feb
SPF: Free
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


I’m half way way to being free of the things that make me anxiety ridden…or at least I hope.

Did you play?

It’s easy, post ONE picture that is ‘FREE’ to you. Go on, get your camera. I know you have one.

PLAY DAMN IT!

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15
Feb
All Day Blogging…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
6:48 am - I woke up sixteen minutes after 6 am. I think the last time I woke up that early was my wedding day. COFFEE. Did you know that EVERYTHING is

sixteen times louder when a baby is sleeping?

In case you missed the message I left about your LOVELY advice about not eating Play-Doh, sniffing butts and hiding under the covers. You realize I’m not a

dog right? Okay, good. Just checking.

7:07 am – SECOND cup of coffee down. I am watching the sun rise over the hill in the backyard. Did you know, and this is going to be SHOCKING to some of

you, the news has traffic reports every 15 minutes? FUH-KING GENIUS, now if only the people IN TRAFFIC had cable hooked up in their car. It’s cool though.

Shaun will be getting a call every 15 minutes for the next hour to get traffic reports. I am such a good wife.

7:51 am – On my second load of laundry. The two cups of coffee have eaten a hole in my stomach. JB is up and watching Teletubies. It’s been years since

we’ve had PBS on this early and Alyx looked at me and in the most serious face said, “Mom, I think Poe has lost weight.”

8:10 am – Alyx and Shea are home for the first part of the day because of dentist appointments and they are helping out. I might not let them go back to

school. ever.
Oh, and in the brief second I got to watch of normal TV, I learned something; Don’t do drugs. That reminds me, need to refill my prescriptions.

11:22 am – After two dentist appointments and dropping 3 kids off at 2 different schools, I’m home! JB fell asleep in his car seat about a minute and half

before I pulled in the driveway. I put him on my bed and he stayed asleep. How much more of this blissful silence will I be graced with?
If he can learn to sleep through my typing, CNN and the dog barking then this will be a walk in the park.
Question; he’s sleeping on my super high bed and I have to pee. I have to hold it right?

11:55 am – Not kidding here people. GOT TO PEE!

1:17 am – I finally got to pee. Damn I’m tired. More coffee? (Yes, I held it THAT long)

2:10 pm – Lunch was SO good. it was left over spaghetti from last night. JB wore more than he ate.
The dog FINALLY came in handy today.
Now it’s Sesame Street time. Dear Lord, THANK YOU for PBS! I will forgive you for the Barney show, as long as you never get rid of Sesame Street. Muppets,

Puppets, songs, colors, cartoons, letters and The Count. Can life get any better than RIGHT now?

3:22 pm – I have decided to Tivo Sesame Street.  I am amazed by my ability to hold so much information in my head at one time. Row. Row. Row Your Boat.

1.2.3.4.5.6.7.8.9.MOM!SHEAHASMYBARBIE. This update brought to you by the number 9.

3:23 pm - Who the hell is the new guy that is the potential daddy to Anna Nicole Smith’s baby? Row. Row. Row your boat. HALO DOWN!  Only 3 more hours.

Pictures to follow.

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14
Feb
Fuh-read-om ??
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


This has been the best Valentine’s Day in all Valentine’s Day history.  It wasn’t because of what I got, but who we spent it with.

Shaun invited ‘Cita and her kids, Kyle and Kianna for dinner.  He then invited his sister and brother law and their daughter, Jessie.  We also had our kids,

Tabitha and little JB (I call him that because I know it bugs her…i’m  evil like that.)

It was awesome being surrounded by my friends and family in my home. I’m not the big entertainer. In fact, I suck at it.  This was SO awesome though.  My

house was actually big enough to fit even more people than I thought could.  Shaun managed the kitchen and I made sure the couch didn’t hit the ceiling.

Everyone seemed to be relaxed and enjoying themselves.  BEST Valentine’s Day EVER.   Thank you Shaun, not for the beautiful flowers, but the beautiful

people you fill my house with.

Now I kick back and wait for my first day being JB’s day care lady that starts tomorrow morning.  I am a ‘day care’ person now.  Personally I think there is a

better name for it and I am pretty certain you will all come up with a name for me, or it will hit me while I am dodging a baby cookie (which I have found turn

to cement after they make contact with baby saliva)

American Idol:  Dude with curly hair and wicked sense of humor.  Right now, my favorite.

SPF:  FREE.  You can take this one and run with it or just find the word ‘free’…what sets you free?  have fun with this.

Any advice for me? It’s been 8 years since I have taken care of baby.  EIGHT years.  *knocking on monitor* hello? DELURK and give me some damn advice!

Comments (19)  //  Add Comment
13
Feb
Happy Valentine’s Day
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
This day is a sucky ass commercialized day…but if you don’t have a Valentine, I have a special place in my blog heart for you; so just say the word and I will

send you strippers dripping in chocolate.  Or just virtual chocolate. If you’re lactose intolerant I’ll just send you flowers. If you have allergies, then I will have

to send jewelery.  If you have metal allergies…well, you’re life pretty much sucks and I will just have to send you a Valentine’s Day hug…or strippers.

And how much would it suck to start your period on Valentine’s day?

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12
Feb
I’m a Wee-Tawd.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


I have thee worst luck with glasses. I’m the last person that will spend more than 10 dollars for a pair because I lose them.
I’ve lost 3 pairs of prescription glasses in the past 10 years.  I don’t know if this is common, but to me it just sounds stupid. Why spend SO much money on

glasses that you KNOW you’re going to lose?

When Tabitha moved in she brought a pair of ‘back up glasses’ because the bastards that robbed her, also broke her glasses, knocking a lens out and under

the car.   She MUST have her glasses because without them she can’t see at all.  I don’t have that problem, I wear glasses because I see better with them on.
Because I had to make Tabitha an appointment to get new glasses, I figured I would make an appointment for myself.

I’m now a ‘glasses’ wearer.

‘Cita and I went out the other night and I was SO impressed with the fact that I made it from the car to the place without getting a single drop of rain on my

glasses.  When it comes to care of glasses, I’m not exactly the example you should follow. I usually take the glasses off and rub them on my shirt to remove

smudges or rain drops.
I also toss them in my purse when I loose the eyeglass case holder after 1 week of owning one.  This is exactly what I did once I got in the place. I took off the

glasses and tossed them in my purse. I did check on them a few times during the night to make sure they didn’t fall out.

At the end of the night, I pulled out my glasses and manged to make it all the way out to the car without getting a single drop of rain on them. SCORE!

When I got home, I took off the glasses and was shocked, “Oh My God, I lost a lens out of my glasses!” I am thinking I am a dumbass for just putting them in

my purse and not taking better care of them.
“Oh My God. I lost BOTH lenses!”  I am putting my fingers through the holes that once housed two perfectly good lens.

That when I saw the inside of the glasses, it had a very cool design on them.  “Hmm. I don’t remember that design being there before.”   And then it hits me

AND Shaun.  He asked me, “You are NOT wearing Tabitha’s glasses are you?”

I had picked up Tabitha’s broken glasses and wore them all night not knowing the difference between MY glasses and a pair without lenses in them.

No one in this house is letting me live that one down either.

Comments (31)  //  Add Comment
11
Feb
Squishy Faces
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


The house is crazy again with all of moving about and trying to find our places and find room.  The ants that have invaded our house are rejoicing that

Tabitha and the baby are back because that means microscopic chunks of baby biscuits will be left around for them to attack in masses.
The first thing I hear every morning is Jeremiah laughing or getting pissed. It’s a great sound to wake up to.  When my snarly self makes it to the kitchen

where Tabitha is shuffling about, the first thing I hear is, “GIRL THESE ANTS!” and then the story of what part of the house was attacked while we slept.

Things are still crazy in my private world.  I am still coming to terms with it and asking myself many questions.  Having the baby here just makes me look at

the whole picture that is my life and how somethings are more important than others.

Last night, Tyler had a dance with a ‘new’ girl he likes. It was interesting introducing ourselves to her mother;
“Hi, I’m Tabitha, Tyler’s mom.”
“HI, I’m Kristine, Tyler’s step-mom.”
You know people have to think we have some crazy, twisted relationship after you hear, “Yes, I’m living with my ex-husband and his new wife’s house.  Me and

the baby. No, the baby isn’t his. Oh, no…we are getting along great!”

Tabitha and I dropped him and his lovely date off for dinner and then went to my little, hole in the wall hangout of yesteryear.  It felt good to sit back and

laugh with her. She had me almost peeing my pants when she leaned over and said, “I finally figured out who that girl (across the bar) looks like!  Remember

the black guy that was dressed up as the white girl in ‘White Chicks’?”
It took a second, but after Tabitha did her impression; “OMG Tiffany, we were such a hit in the Hamptons!” I started laughing because she was so right.  This

poor woman looked like a black man impersonating a white chick.  Every time she spoke to us I had to use all my will power not to laugh…she even

SOUNDED like the girl/guy.

And now on to the fun stuff. I have to make an appointment with my doctor to figure out what the hell is going on with my bald spots.
The last time I was there and I was telling him about how many kids I had and then how I was now watching my niece, he thought I had lost my mind.   He

insisted that I shouldn’t take anymore stuff on until I got my anxiety worked through.
I am almost afraid to tell him, “Oh yea, and by the way I am now going to be watching my husband’s ex-wife’s son who is not even a year old during the day

while she goes back to work and gets back on her feet.”
I’m sure he might strangle me with his stethoscope.  I’m not going to tell him that she’s living here.  He will squish my head with his massive hands.

Last, but not least…I’m going to remind you every single post this week that 48 hours THIS SATURDAY will have the updated Christie Wilson story.  If you

have Tivo…GO RECORD IT. If you don’t…I will be reminding you nearly almost everyday to watch it.  The 48 hours crew was very supportive to Christie’s

family and we want to repay them by watching the show they put together.  Thanks everyone for hanging with me on this one…and all that I go through.

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08
Feb
Stuff Portrait Friday – Something RED.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


I found this in Old Sacramento. I lovvve love looooove flaky paint.  I could sit there for hours and pick flaky paint off of surfaces.  I think it has something to

do with being iron deficient…oh wait, that’s if I eat the paint.

DID YOU PLAY???

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08
Feb
Holy Shit and so forth!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Anna Nicole Smith died.

Kami broke the news to me over Yahoo Messenger and it went something like this:

Kami: Anna Nicole Smith died.
Me: No!
Kami: Yes!
Me: NO!
Kami: YES!
Me: NO FUCKING WAY!
Kami: WAY!

After 2 hours of the same conversation over and over again she reminded me that I didn’t have anything up for SPF:

Sooo,

SOMETHING RED


Please leave a comment for upcoming weeks of SPF suggestions.

Thank you Kami for this weeks suggestion. If anyone is interested my Yahoo IM is Kristine_Seguin and if you have Yahoo, add me to your friends list.  Just let

me know you’re a reader of R&O when you IM me. I keep getting men from other countries trying to get me to marry them for a green card.

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08
Feb
babyback, babyback, babyback…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Tabitha (Shaun’s ex-wife) and Jeremiah (her 10 month old baby boy) are coming home today.  Colorado just wasn’t their thing, which is fine with me, because

her kids missed her madly and I know Shaun and I missed her and the baby.

On a mission tonight I bought him the most grand car seat the world has ever seen.
We got it home and pulled out the 500 page manual on how to get it adjusted and car ready.

This was going to be his ‘big boy car seat’ that he would climb in and love like no other child has loved a car seat.

I got into my minivan and like a magical wizard I began adjusting straps and making sure that thing was strapped in with all the safety requirements in check.

I then got into the front seat and realized…this seat was clearly made for diesel 18 wheelers. It was Ginormous! We couldn’t even see out my rear view window

with it strapped in.  Shaun had made a comment on the size of the box when I got it home and I ignored him because…well, I don’t like it when Shaun talks.

When I took it out of the box it didn’t look THAT big.

Frustrated we took it back to Target and had to go find a substandard sized one. I was pissed because I liked the one that Shaun liked to call the ‘Recliner’ of

all car seats.

We found one that would work better, not only in my van, but in her Mustang. Because of the price difference we found a exsosauser that bounces and makes

lots of annoying sounds.

Marina spent a lot of time putting it together with love and tenderness for her baby brother. Shaun and I put the car seat in and now I am ready to head to the

airport to pick up my friend and lil’ mister man.

I also put the table corner things on so when he smacks his forehead on the table 39 times in one day, his bruising will be only minor.

We drug the swing and high chair out of the garage. Our home is once again cluttered with baby toys and accessories. We couldn’t be happier to have it all

out again.

Is this the most ideal time for them to come back? Probably not.   There is no way that I am NOT going to invite them back into my home though,  they are

family.


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06
Feb
ya’all funny…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I swear I haven’t laughed so hard in days.  Thank you for all the emails and phone numbers.

Since my email isn’t sending OUT anything and it looks like I am avoiding all questions, let me answer them here:

1. No, Shaun didn’t cheat on me.
2. No, Shaun did not cheat on me with Gwen Stephani.
3. No, Shaun didn’t hit me.
4. No, Shaun didn’t come to his senses and leave my ass for someone better and younger.
5. No, Shaun didn’t sleep with his ex-wife while she was staying with us.
6. No, I didn’t have a flash back memory of my childhood where I was molested, which never happened. Thanks for the disturbing image though and all those

links.
7. No, I do not not need ya’all to come over/down/up here to kick someone’s ass. Thank you though.

You are all very sweet and I love each one of you and your crazy ideas of what could possibly be wrong with me.  I love each one of you that offered to bring a

bat. I love all the emails where you sent me numbers of people you know that can ‘take care of the problem’.  I know people that know people. That’s

awesome.

Where were you guys when I needed help burying that exboyfriend in the backyard though? Hmmm???

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05
Feb
Behind Closed Doors…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


I keep saying, “I have so much going on and when it calms down I can write about it.”  I haven’t though and when I finally get through something I want to

forget it even happened because the pain of it is too much to put to words.

Usually I can find something positive that came from it and circle around that.  Right now I am living in a personal hell and I KNOW something positive will

come from it, but it’s not something I can talk about it because even though it directly effects me, it’s not my issue to talk about.

As I type this I am sitting in a coffee house across the table from my ex-husband who is on his laptop.  I am writing about my life and he is…I don’t know,

creating some sort of program that will make life easier for all computer users…who cares what he’s doing.  The point is, we are sitting here across from each

other.  There was a time that the sound of his voice made me want to throw large objects at things that would break.

I have to believe that no matter what happens in my life, I will be alright.  If I can survive my marriage to bafoon sitting across from me, giving birth to three

children, divorcing the bafoon, going back to school to get my GED and then going to college to get my degree and then DATING…I can survive anything. I

am stronger than I give myself credit for.  I have come to believe anyone that can survive the emotional turmoil of a divorce can survive ANYTHING after that.

Shit, anyone that can survive the emotional turmoil of dating after a divorce can survive anything.  Can I hear an Amen?

So, once again, you get to hear…*insert my brother’s dorky voice* “I’m going through some stuff right now…”

You will be hearing how I am awkwardly struggling through these things, without any great detail. It will be much like a reading about a wreck someone you

love was in, but you don’t know what kind of wreck, if it was a fender bender or the car getting hit by a train.  I’m not really sure right now how bad the damage

is either. I am still trying to get myself out of the seat belt, but I’m trying to do it with no feeling in my hands.

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04
Feb
Sail on, down the line about half mile or so…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Thank UPPERCASE GOD for Ipods and Mp3 players.
I took all the girls to Redding this weekend and instead of fighting over what radio station to listen to, we all had on our earphones.   Yes, I did too…and yes, I

know; against the law.  3 hours in a car with 2 teenage girls and 2 two younger kids means I BREAK THE LAW.

After 6 hours in the car and our Ipods and MP3 players died we found other ways to stay awake:

1. See how long we can hold our pee and cause a bladder infection.
2. Mad Libs.
3. Count how many times I hear ‘mom’.
4. Try to calculate how miles per minute I am driving and then calculate in my head what time I will be there.
5. Change speed and recalculate.
6. Recite the Declaration of Independence in my head.
7. Try to dust the dashboard by blowing really hard on it.
8. Make up nail polish names A-Z
9. Count how many times I blink when the vent is directly pointed in my face.

and, my personal favorite; 10. cross my eyes and see how long I can drive like that.

Yeah, it was fun drive there and home.

Comments (13)  //  Add Comment
02
Feb
SPF- Buttons
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Today’s SPF entry, a button picked up while shopping last weekend.



Comments (36)  //  Add Comment
01
Feb
The Crash Test Dummy speaks
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I just wrote a post and then I deleted it.

I’m going to give you some of the best advice that was ever given to me during my divorce;
“You know you know. He knows what he knows.  That’s even ground.  If you tell him what you know, he knows what HE knows and what YOU know.  Who’s the

smarter person? He is, he now knows twice as much as you do.”

Being lied to is the worst thing for me. Some people say, “I look for humor in a relationship.”  I don’t. I look for honesty because there is NOTHING funny

about being lied to or having someone go behind your back and hide things from you.

So, I know what I know. I’m going to keep that information to myself.  I will also NEVER trust this person again.

That sucks.

Comments (33)  //  Add Comment
30
Jan
She said, WHAT?
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


My driving nemesis didn’t show up at school today to drive up my blood pressure.

So, to entertain you: “Konversations with Kristine”

Me: “Hey Kath…where’s mom? I want her to see the picture on Flickr of Shea making the baby blanket.”
Kath: “She’s in her room. Hold on. She’s watching some Tommy Lee movie.”
Me: *blink.blink*  “What?”
Kath: “MOM! Kris wants you to check her Flickr account so you can see her picture of Shea.”
Me: “What is she watching?”
Kath: “Some Tommy Lee movie.” she starts talking to Mom again, “Is he still pecking away?”
Me: “WHAT THE HELL IS SHE WATCHING?”

My mind is rolodexing through any other movie Tommy Lee has ever been in that didn’t have him ‘pecking away’ at anything other than Pamela Anderson.

Kath: “She’s watching some Tommy Lee Jones movie.”
Me:  “Yeah, that was not a good mental picture you had going in my head.”

**********************

After taking a picture of Shea and realizing I had the shutter speed ALL kinds of wrong:

Me: “Ewww! Yuck.”
Shea: “What?”
Alyx: “Your face.”

*************************

‘Cita and I in the car today and we pull up to a woman in a truck blaring Carrie Underwood’s “Jesus Take The Wheel.”

‘Cita:  “Jesus take the wheel huh?  She’s smoking with one hand and talking on the phone with the other, SOMEONE better take the wheel.”

**************************

I’m trying to get through some things in my life right now and I promise when things work themselves out, I will be funny and happy again.  Until then, you

get random and odd shit.   Guess it’s a good thing I named my site R&O.

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29
Jan
Taking the divorce in stride…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I was never a big fan of K-Fed.

And then I saw the commercial he made:  Click Here.
I think I have a little crush on him now. It takes a big set of Kiwis to poke fun at yourself on a commercial that is going to air during the Superbowl!

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29
Jan
SPF
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
The Rules:

On Monday or Tuesday I will post 3 items. 1 item. On Friday you post your picture of the ‘stuff’ listed.
Come back and let me know you played by posting a comment on my blog. Everyone that plays will come and visit (or at least I hope they do)

This game is for everyone. Encourage your players to play and comment on your blog if they played so you can get to know your readers. If you want to send

them over here to let me know they played, Great!

Feb 2nd 2007

SPF:

Buttons.

It could be a ‘button’ nose, butterscotch ‘buttons’, clothes buttons, button/pins, button flowers…you decide. Feeling creative?

( I even updated the SPF page)

Yes, I know…you’re all waiting for something worth reading. I’m getting there. I can write about my new glasses, my head not hurting so much, Shea-isms,

the fact that I cleaned my freezer today….but BORING.

Tomorrow I want to tell you all about the lady that I have decided is my ‘driving nemesis’. She seriously needs driving lessons and should not be driving a

big SUV.
I’m going to bring a sneaky camera to school tomorrow and videotape the horribleness that is her driving.

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28
Jan
WTF?
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I’m not saying my head is completely pulled out of my ass, but I just realized some shit;

Where the hell is Closet Metro – Dave?

and uh…how many of my damn links on the side don’t work anymore?

Where..what..whoo….Yeah, I’ve been in a coma for a long time and I am trying to get my crap together, STARTING with Dave.
Anyone know where he went?

Comments (16)  //  Add Comment

26
Jan
Drama Club
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Kara was in a play last night. After the emotionally draining day of yesterday I wasn’t looking forward to a play, but Kara was SOOOO excited and there was NO

way in hell I was going to miss my daughter play a person that robs a diner!
She, of course, was the best actress there.
Something tells me that all the faking she was sick has finally paid off.  Drama is in her blood.

The next time she has a play I am going to film it so you can all see her before she hits Hollywood and you can say, “I knew her when she was just a bit player

on Random and Odd.”

How strange…you guys are watching my children grow up with me.
*Group hug*  Fuck, I need to up the damn medication! I’m a blithering idiot.

Comments (9)  //  Add Comment
26
Jan
Friday’s SPF: MY BUDDY
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


This was taken yesterday morning before they left for Colorado. We have this game we would play called, “Stick it!”  He would burrow his head into my neck

and I would count to three and pull his legs up and he would be doing his baby headstand and I would say, “aaaannnnddd STICK IT!” and land his feet back

on my stomach.  He would always make me laugh because he wouldn’t even look up, he would already be trying to get me to count to three and do it again.



This is Shaun and Jeremiah doing his game called, “BULL FIGHT!”  Shaun would get at the end of the air mattress and pound his hands on the bed and yell,

‘come on Buddy, BULL FIGHT!” and Jeremiah would crawl over to him and they would put their heads together until Shaun fell over in defeat.  Jeremiah then

would slap his face to get him to ‘wake up’ after his loss.

They made it to Colorado safely.  It’s been REALLY hard on us with them not being here.  Everything feels different. When Shaun and I finally stopped for a

second and tried to have a moment to hold each other he said something that made us both laugh.
“How can a small house that has 7 people living in it feel so empty?  Are we idiots?”

Thank you all for the nice things you’ve said.  The ones that are getting the most out of us all getting along is the kids.  They feel the brunt of emotions when

we all fight, so I can only imagine that the positive effect it’s going to have on them now and later in life.
Ryan’s mom is actually being nice to me lately. I’m not sure what the switch in her behavior was, but I’m glad it happened.
Ryan told me in a online chat, “If it wasn’t for the fact that no one is yelling and mad at each other, I would think it was weird.” The fact that his mom hated me

so much was really a sore spot in his heart.  It’s painful having to ‘pick a side’ and then having to recount everything you did that weekend because one

parent doesn’t like the step parent/real parent and they want to find fault in the other.  It was painful for him for 15 years, it’s time for him to get a chance to

feel what all of our kids have…weird ass parents that get along.

It’s strange how your whole life can change. It was almost two months ago that we walked into the hospital and took a very humble and vulnerable  woman

home.  It was two months ago that Jeremiah was just turning 9 months old and he wouldn’t even look at us, let alone let us hold him.  It was two months ago

when I really, truly learned about what being a grown up means.

All the stuff you think about another person is probably not true.  I wouldn’t advise having your husband’s ex-wife move in to find out if it’s true or not.  I

would advise to … I don’t know… I guess just BE YOURSELF.  If that person gets a chance to ‘get you’ for who you are, there is a good chance they will like

that person better than the one that you want them to think you are.  Did that make sense?

You all can love me for all my random and oddness.  I’m a stranger. I could, for all you know, be that bitchy woman at the PTA meetings and the snotty

neighbor that lets my dog shit on your yard.   You got to know me for who I am though…try giving that much to a relationship that may or may not be so

great.   The worst think that that could happen is you’re now known as “Auntie Koo-Koo”  (as in ‘weird aunt kristine)

I’m sorry… DID YOU PLAY?

Comments (31)  //  Add Comment
25
Jan
unheard of & SPF
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


If you would have told me two months ago that Shaun’s ex-wife and her 9 month old baby was going to move in with us for two months and the day she left we

would all be in tears, I would have NEVER believed you.
I say this because I figured I might have either killed myself or divorced Shaun before either of those two things would have happened.

Our house is quiet. Toooooooo quiet. It’s so depressing around here.

So in light of missing our little guy tomorrow’s SPF picture is:  YOUR BUDDY

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24
Jan
Shea being nosey when she doesn’t need to be.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
“Hello, this is the school nurse and I need to know if you have her shot records because she is missing her last set.”
“uuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh….yeah……Her next appointment is February 6th….you’re welcome. Yes, I will bring them in on February 6th.”

Shea face is white as a ghost.  “mom. no!”

“Yes, you have your next shots coming up.”

She is now doing this dramatic neck grabbing and whining, “nooooooooooooo!!”

I have NO tolerance for it so I stop it before it gets to be too much. “Shut up Shea, you have to get shots, deal with it.”

“But Mooooooooooooooooommmmmm, why do they have to shoot me in the neck?”

“What? The shots they give you are in the arm, not your neck.”

“Oh, but you said, your Neck Shots were on February 6th.”

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22
Jan
Mr. Clean. Mr. Clean.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I called Kaiser (our health care provider) today to find out about getting an appointment about my head.  Not the stuff in my head, but the stuff falling OUT of

it.

Since my divorce…or around that time…I started getting red patches on my head and it itched.  Then it wouldn’t. Then it would. Then it wouldn’t. Then it

would. You seeing the cycle yet?  Two years of hearing my sister tell me, “That is NOT right, go get it checked.”  I went in and got it checked.  The doctor told

me, “You’re stressed out. Stop stressing out and your hair will stop falling out and the patches will go away. Take this in case I’m wrong.”

It didn’t work.

Now fast forward FIVE years later to last night when I lay my head down on the pillow and MY SCALP HURTS.  Yes, it is tender to the touch.  Yeah, time to call

the doctor.

My doctor, who Shaun likes to call the witch doctor because you go in and be VERY direct about your problem and try not to notice that just one of his hands

could crush your melon with very little effort.  He then writes something down and says, “You take this. It go away.”  Then he brushes his hands together that

makes all the air in the room swirl about and does some Zimbabwean chant, then yells;  “ALL GONE.  Any questions?” and you say, “No.” and hurry out the

room.  You don’t dare make direct eye contact because his gaze will surly kill you.  He wasn’t there.  I was somewhat happy that he had taken a vacation.  I

could also wait a few days before I would get an appointment and maybe my problem will have gone away.

No such luck. I guess having hair fall out and not being able to put your head on a pillow merits an appointment ASAP.

The new doctor seemed like he was going to be a nice one because he had a head of healthy gray hair, warm smile and firm handshake.  I should have known

I was in trouble when after I told him what my problem was, he shook his head and said, “Yeah, you’re probably not going to like what I say…but that’s

okay…I’m retiring at the end of the week so when you call to complain, tell them it’s the doctor that is now on a cruise ship.”  I just laughed and waited to

hear what I had to do to someday be able to touch the side of my head without squealing in pain.
“You have anxiety right?” He asked.
“Yes. I have lots of…” He cut me off before I could tell him all the stuff I could stress about in great detail, with pictures to make the details of my anxiety just

‘POP’.
“What did you stress about 2 days ago?”
Once again, I start to tell him about all the things, wishing I had brought my laptop so I could show him the power point presentation I had made about all the

stuff I have anxiety about, but he cuts me off again.

Clearly he needs to take a second look at the other side, or he wanted to break my neck to shut me up.  I sit there and just take the abuse, because really…

he’s the guy that is going to ultimately be able to fix the problem and he is retiring at the end of the week and he didn’t get his kill quota in last month.

“You’re body is reacting to what is happening in your life. You had high anxiety in last couple of days and your body is trying to tell you to stop stressing

out.”

“Great, so what now?”
“Nothing.”
“What? I mean, isn’t there anything you can give me that will make this go away? I mean, I’m going to bald in 2 weeks if I don’t get something to fix this

problem.  Did you SEE the size of the amount of hair I am missing? it’s HUGE!”  I’m trying my hardest to be calm, but this guy is cool as a cucumber.
“Ma’am, this is nothing compared to others I have seen.”  He is writing some stuff down on the paper and I am wishing I had the witch doctor here to give me

some salve and do his chant.  Hell, I would stay with his village for a month if it would relieve the pain of my hair falling out.

“Here, take this and it will relieve the redness and irritation, but ultimately YOU have to the be one to get it to stop falling out.”

I dared to ask him a few other unrelated questions and he told me, “Stop taking that; Don’t depend on that to work; That will never go away; You’re going to

die someday and it’s going to be VERY painful.”

And I left with a bottle of some stuff and happy that I didn’t have what I thought I had…hair cancer.  I’m not sure if anyone has ever HAD hair cancer, but It

would be MY luck that I would be the first.  If I had chemo for hair cancer, instead of my hair falling out…would it grow back in?

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20
Jan
guess who I love?
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


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19
Jan
I’m Tivoing life right now so I can fast forward through the shitty parts.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Note how the PAUSE button is in focus? Yeah. Pause. That’s a bad ass word. “I’m just Paused right now”. Pause is going to be the new IT word.

Who knows what would happen if we all just paused for a moment to be quiet and enjoy the time of peace. Yeah, I know. Someone would fart and we would all

be giggling and blaming someone else.

Well, if you happen to PAUSE for a second today; Go say Hi to Susie.

Happy First SPF of 2007 (and Thanks The Kept Woman for keeping him going for us while I was being an airhead…you are the now the official Godmother of

SPF and lifetime baby sitter when I feel the need to just crawl beneath the covers and wail and try to eat the pillow)

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18
Jan
They called me a airhead in high school. Don’t know why.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I lied.  I didn’t do it on purpose, because I’m not a purposeful liar, I’m just a ‘oh, oops, I know I should have done that, but I didn’t, even though I said I was

going to, I suck.’ variety of liar.  Yes, I’m talking about Stuff Portrait Friday assignment.  I got lazy with all the stress last month and let Shaun take over and

he did a great job. Right? can I get an “Amen, sista!”?  Good, thank you. Anyway, he took over and did it and then the new year came around and I’m all

about getting my life together and taking back my life from whatever the hell happened to me.
I have cleaned my room and done laundry EVERY SINGLE DAY.  This, my friends…is HUUUUU-GGGGGG-EEEE!
I have also been taking steps to go to bed without the television on. If I have the boob-tube on, I turn it off at midnight and will myself to sleep.  It’s working

and I am finally changing my sleeping habits.

But, that doesn’t mean that I should neglect Stuff Portrait Friday. I am going to twist it around a little bit, because I have lost my love for it.  STOP THROWING

FISH AT ME!
I love taking pictures, but the pressure of it caused me to drop out of the 365 days of Random and Odd. It has caused me to stop getting in the car and take

pictures.  I haven’t touched Earl or Randy in many days and it’s sad. What the hell?
I’m going to take STUFF PORTRAIT FRIDAY from 3 pictures on Friday to ONE picture on Friday.  I’m going to open it up to be more artistic or completely

brainless; depending on what you’re feeling that week.

We cool?  Okay, don’t get mad, I just need to re-find my love of SPF.  I need to find the new boundaries of my new relationship with SPF.  I need SPF to

romance me a little bit before I put out.

If you want to play this week; shootin’ from the hip; on the fly…then feel free to join me. (and feel free to ignore my use of ” ; ” in this and all future posts. I

don’t really know the proper use of it, but I really like the way it looks. I might trade in my three dot dot dots for it)

Tomorrow’s assignment:  Your Television Remote/s.

(see, that one was the brainless one, next week I might feel a little more Cuhhh-razy and do something to make you think)

*smoooches to all of you*  and for the men readers…I put a little ass and boob in this post JUST FOR YOU!

Sasssyyyyy!

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17
Jan
in the crawl space below rock bottom
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Some days are good. Some days are awesome. Some days just SUCK. Yesterday…SUCKED.

I thought I was doing pretty good because I got up and was in a great mood. I was ready to start my day off with exchanging a pair of pants that were too BIG.

Yes, you heard me, TOO BIG.

Then I got in the car.

I just would like to a moment to say how sorry I am that the people of Rocklin have to share a road with me. It’s really not THEIR fault that I am pretty damn

certain that they are going to veer into my lane causing me to spin out and flip my minivan 400 times before landing on black ice and spinning out of control

like a carnival ride only to come to stop in the middle of the lane with a semi truck that carries hundred gallons of gas coming right at me.
I know this isn’t a realistic thing that would happen, but it doesn’t stop me from screaming at the car in front of me that had the NERVE to put on his brakes to

come to a stop.

It’s also not right for me scare old people that are slowly pulling out of the Target shopping center by coming around a corner and jumping OUT OF MY SKIN

because they looked like they MIGHT hit me. I’m pretty sure the cart, 4 new pillows and 40 gallons of water would have protected me, but it didn’t stop me

from squealing and doing what might have looked like a ‘pee pee’ dance when the car pulled out.

Also, the lady in the maroon Escalade, I’m sorry. I’m sure you have fine depth perception, but it REALLY looked like you were going to take off my mirror and

possibly rip the whole front end of my van off when you parked in front of me outside the school. You probably think I a complete idiot because I know you

had to see me pounding my forehead into the steering wheel over and over after you parked.

The many people on Park Blvd yesterday, SORRY. just SORRY. I know you have all been driving for many years, but it didn’t stop me from yelling at you to

“GET THE HELL OFF MY ASS!”, “HOLY SHIT, YOU TOOK THAT CORNER TO FAST!” “ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL PEOPLE HERE!?”. Yes, there were many of

you that might have gotten the glare in my rear view mirror as I tried to make it around town like a normal person can.

Lastly. I am sorry to the band AC/DC who’s song I destroyed in my attempt to get over the 700 hundredth anxiety attack I was having yesterday. I realized after

the 5th time I started “Highway to Hell” that I really have NO fucking clue what the damn words to that song really are. I have about 80% down, but the other

20% is me making up words and that is just WRONG. You have earned right in Rock and Roll history and you don’t need some mini-driving anxiety attackin’

mom, slashing your poor song to death. I promise to look up the words and when I am road raging again, I will belt out each line as YOU wrote it, not the

words that I make up to look cool. Sorry ’bout that.

As you can see, I am STILL in the middle of my battle. By 4 o’clock yesterday I was drained. It takes so much out of a person to have anxiety. All the ups and

downs make it hard to function outside of your comfort bubble.

Did you catch the part where I exchanged a pair of pants for a smaller size though?

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13
Jan
PMS and new shoes…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


The other day the two older girls had a meltdown that I’m sure you all heard.  I don’t care what country you’re in, you HAD to hear it.  It was the sound of Kara

and Marina at each other’s throats.
Who would have guessed that telling them to ‘clean their room’ was going to be an all out war that would end up with hysterical crying and me screaming at

the top of my lungs, “IF YOU SAY, “FRIGGIN” one more time I am going to backhand you RIGHT in the mouth! WE CLEAR? WE CLEAR?”

I swear our house is an estrogen warehouse.  We have enough estrogen for a small country that is running low.  I don’t know how much more I can take of it.  

The need to shake them until they start their periods is just overwhelming.

After the meltdown I dropped Kara off with her dad, who she insisted that she might move with.  When she said those words I contorted my face in such a way

that I looked like one of those freaky Bratz dolls.  “Oh hell no, you can just keep THINKIN’ that, it’s not going to happen! You’re father will move in with US

before that happens.”
I really should be careful throwing around threats like that though, because you know me…I would take him in too.

Marina and I needed to find a way to bring ourselves back to normal levels.  Milkshakes and new shoes seemed to do the trick.
I had been eyeballing those horrible clog looking shoes for awhile and I finally tried them on. HOLY HELL they were comfortable!  I bought the black ones.

Estrogen levels back to normal. Amen.

Today as I was getting ready to leave Shaun asked if I was going to wear my strainer shoes.  I knew what he was talking about, but wasn’t going to give him

the glory of making fun of my clogs. I was going to wear them with pride.
As I was walking down the hallway, Shaun yelled from the kitchen, “Look honey, I bought you an extra pair.”
He stood there holding two black strainer spoons.

“Shut up, Shaun.”

He then stated “How could I not like shoes that you can wear and strain spaghetti with at the same time?”
Smart ass.

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12
Jan
R & O
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
“Hi honey.  Happy Halfaversary!”

“Huh?”

“We’ve been married a half a year today.”

“Huh?”

“Here.”  Shaun hands me a card. No retract that, HALF of a card.  I open up half the envelope and take out the half of a card where he tells me he loves me.

“You are so cute.  What other guy would think to give a ‘halfaversary’ card?”

“Well, I bet they would be a big hit if they were easier to find!”

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11
Jan
It’s Over.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
‘Cita and I made our way to the court house extra early to make sure we had a spot in the court room for the sentencing of Mario Garcia in the murder case of

Christie Wilson.

Butterflies were in my stomach as we walked up to the court house with a gift for Christie’s mom in hand.

The court room was packed and we were given our badges to get in. We waited outside and the advocate asked us very nicely if we could please give our

badges up for people had been victims of Mario Garcia in the past. Of course, we handed them over and just hoped there was a chance for us to get inside

and hear the verdict. We weren’t allowed in along with 15 more people. The advocate for the victims let us read the impact statements that would be read in

court and each letter ripped through my heart. Her mother talking about the first time she held her daughter and told her she loved her. Her sister talking

about the joys that Christie brought her life. Her father talking of the tears that would stream down his face as he drove to Sacramento to search for his

daughter.

When Debbie and Pat (Christie’s parents) walked in and she saw us sitting by the court room door she made her way over to us and hugged us and said,

“Ohhh, my HOPE is here.” We were greeted with loving hugs.
In ever letter, post or email…I told her, don’t lose her hope that Christie will be found. She relates us to her ‘Hope’ and her husband calls us ‘his searching

soccer moms’.

Yesterday Marina and Kara battled it out to the point of screaming and making everyone’s lives hell. The first impact statement I read was Stacie’s letter and I

broke down and cried. It hit so very close to home at that time. I know your sister can sometimes be your enemy and you fight and say names…but you don’t

know what tomorrow will bring. I thought of the loss of my sister and not having her there for me. I don’t believe I would be able to express how losing my

sister so brutally would tear me up inside.
After the interviews I talked to Stacie and I asked her if she had a copy of her impact statement. She pulled a crumpled and tear stained paper to give to my

daughters.

Before court I handed a present for Debbie. It was a snow globe. Inside was a silver angel and the words on the base were, “HOPE”. She cried and told me that

she has the candle holder we gave her at the beginning of all of this next to her phone in her kitchen and always thinks about the support that she has gotten

through all of this.

I remember her words all those months ago, “I make it through this because I can feel all the prayers.”

As the family of the victims walked from the court room, one of the most amazing reporters came straight up to us and said, “59 years to life without chance

of parole”. You could see the turmoil on her face as she announced the best news we could have gotten.

This case has touched everyone that has any part of it. Justice was served today in court.

Thank you all so much for your prayers for a family you didn’t even know. You prayed for them, wrote letters, gave me strength when I needed it the most.

I admire each one of you so very much. Thank you!

Channel 10 news coverage with video

Channel 3 news coverage with video

Channel 13 news coverage with video

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11
Jan
Thursday without SPF?
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Yeah. I know…two weeks in a row that we haven’t handed out assignments for SPF. No worries. I will be back next week with an assignment that will make your

toes tingle.
The Kept Woman was having withdrawals and decided to start handing out some SPF crack. If you need to get your fix, run on over to her site and see what

she has cookin’ in her crack spoon.

Today is the sentencing phase of Mario Garcia in the death of Christie Wilson. I am making every effort into getting there to show my support for the family.

The girls started karate and I was surprised how excited I was to watch them do their thing. Dan signs them up for all kinds of stuff and I just stand back and

roll my eyes wondering how long it will last. I know, I am SO supportive. I was so thrilled to see the girls really getting into the kicking and HI-Ya-ing. It was

cool.

I got new medication for the ‘crazies’ and I am hoping it will snap me back into place quickly. I went to sleep last night WITHOUT the television on. That is a

first in many, many years.

Baby steps, Dr. Marvin…baby steps.

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08
Jan
No excuses…Okay, maybe one or two.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


I know, it’s the loser way out by putting up a virginal picture of Shaun and hope that will get me by for a few days. No such luck, you guys continue to email

me and ask me if I am feeling well or if my spleen has slipped out while urinating.

Yes I’m OK. No I’m not OK.

Tabitha and the baby are still here and instead of pulling out my hair and walking the backyard to find a spot I haven’t buried a body, I am finally feeling

‘normal’. It’s nice having an assistant mom to help run things and make sure the front part of the house is being manned while I reorganize my closet for the

21st time in 2 weeks.

Yes, you heard me right. Tabitha and I are doing good. She got her licenses and bank card the other day and I had to go in the bedroom and shut the door.

I’m not ready for her and the baby to go. I actually cried at the thought of her not being on my living room floor in morning or hearing him laugh when she

does her dorky voice at him.
The other night I went out with the video camera and I recorded it. Who would have guessed I would have not only taken in my husband’s ex-wife, but also

value the friendship I have gotten from her being here. Certainly not me. I’m not ready for her to go. I’m not ready for the baby to go either. They leave on the

25th of the month and I know as the time gets closer I am eventually going to break down and sob. Or maybe she can piss me off before she leaves so we can

avoid all the sloppy tears.

I promised myself to get myself back to writing and expressing what I am going through. That is why you all manage to find your way back here. You’re just

waiting for me to snap huh?

My aunt keeps rollercoastering through the days in the hospital. My sister is better at keeping everyone updated on what is going with her.

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06
Jan
9th Grade Picture…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


I swear, I married the cutest guy in class.  Come on, don’t deny it, you would have totally been all over him!!

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03
Jan
“Uh, what’s up with Random and Odd?”
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I’m still alive. I have just been battling lately and didn’t feel like spewing my anxiety ridden crap here.

Imina (that is ‘I am in a’ for those of that don’t speak ‘Kristinese’) Imina spiral right now.  I have been trying to get stuff organized and in the process,

stumbling across a lot of the life I had before this one.  I found about 16 journals dating all the way back into the early 80′s.  I made the mistake of reading

through some of them and I realized that this has been a problem ALL my life, not just the last few years.   I’m happy, but Iminaspiral.  Doctor’s appointment

is already set for 4 pm tomorrow.

My aunt is in the hospital. My sister called me today to tell me that my brother went in and said goodbye to her.  My brother is a ‘no-shit-typa-guy’ and he

calls em as he sees em.  When my grandma went into the hospital my mom said, ‘ohhhh, she’ll be fine…just fainted.’  My brother called me from the hospital

and told me to get my ass home because my grandma was going to die.  Grandma died less than 48 hours later.  I know this is the last trip to the hospital my

aunt will make now.
I opted not to go see her. It sounds so cruel to write those words, but I can’t see her like that.  I want to remember her the way she was when I was a kid.  I

don’t want to see her with all that world has done to her on her face.  She survived a lot of things that most people will hopefully never have to see.

I’m worried about my mom.  She is watching all of her friends die around her.  It makes me scared because I don’t want her to think that is even an option for

her.  My mother will live forever.  She has to. I need to know she’s there and I need to know my sister is there…for me. I can’t do this all by myself.

I don’t want my aunt to die.

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